Yes, I’m a Southern Boy!
Well,
I’m a southerner born and raised in the south, and I wouldn’t live anywhere else.
Now let me tell you why: Naturally, living with other southerners is on top of
my list, and it’s easy to see why being surrounded by other like-kind folks is
so positive. It’s because, within every southerner, there is a streak of open
hospitality that is just a natural part of our being. I know saying ‘southern
hospitality’ is trite, but it’s true, and there are thousands of examples to
prove my point. A wave from a pickup truck driver on a back road to a young
girl holding a door open for an elderly man, exemplifies the best part of a
southerner’s character. Yes, it’s really who we are, and it’s a big piece of
why living in the south is so pleasant, and of course, the best looking women
in the country live in the south. Now, I know that going to rub a few
transplanted Yankees the wrong way, but let’s just be honest: Name a New
England State that can match Arkansas, Mississippi, or Texas in the number of
Miss Americas’. Well, not only are Southern gals gorgeous, but by living in the
South their conversations can vary from former country girls talking about
struggling to get by when they were young, to dining out in New York City. I
went to several Christmas parties, and one of the best was sitting around a
table for five with four neat southern women. The conversations ranged from
tequila stories to working on a Bradley County tomato farm, and it was a
delightful evening.
Yes, I know just being from the
south can throw a predisposition from a snooty New York waiter, if you’re in dining at a Le Restaurant, but
I smile when I think about ordering escargots, and I know while I can dine with
the best of them in New York City, they would be lost in what to order from the
menu at the Superior Grill in Shreveport. Bill Clinton had to overcome that
during his first term in office, and yes, that attitude does gives us
southerners something of a chip on our shoulders.
We southerner aren’t
perfect, but I’d rather live with our shortcomings in a trade for just living
with other southerners. I know we pay The University football coach several
times of what we pay the University President, but University Presidents are a
dime a dozen, and a football coach who can win six or more SEC games is
probably worth several million more than the President. At least that what
we’re saying when the morons in Northwest Arkansas negotiate football coach
contracts, and when southerners vote for Trump it’s because we don’t mind the
lying or voting against our economic interest, it’s southerners are telling New
York, California, and the rest the World to “Go to hell,” and that, whether you
are a Southern Democrat or a Republican, rings a deep-seated bell in every southerner,
whose grandmother or great grandmother raised you with a southern chip on your
shoulder.
I think southerners live a more
varied and fuller life because we live in the south. Just to give you an
example, we had some New York friends over for dinner one night and the
conversation turned to guns, and he asked, “Do you have
any guns?” To ask an Arkansawyer if he or she owns guns is like asking a fish
if it swims. Of course, I said “Yes” He asked, “Really, how many?” And then
before I could answer, he said, “Did you just buy your gun” I answered, “No, my
dad bought me my first gun, a Mossberg .20 gauge when I was 8, and later a
Sweet .16, and of course I have a couple of twenty-twos,”…Well, I stopped before
I got to the pistols because he was looking at me like you might react to
someone in an Arab headdress carrying a violin case getting on an airplane.
Yes, living in the semi-rural south—And every town under 50,000 is
semi-rural---opens up an opportunity to drive 30 minute to a river or lake to
fish, and most southerner can walk to a wooded area to hunt. It’s a southern
bonus we take for granted, and southern forests are the greatest expanse of
trees in the country. Wow, our trees sure add to our quality of life.
Now let’s
talk about the weather, and yes the south is sometimes so hot and humid that
you think you’re living in a sauna, but the good Lord gave us the ability to
sweat, and I’d rather sweat a bucket full than freeze my ass off in North
Dakota, or this year anywhere north of Fayetteville. Yes, we do have a little
rough weather occasionally, but I’ll take an occasional tornado over
earthquakes and wildfires. Heck, I like to be surprised by the weather, and
southern weather keeps you from being bored. My best thoughts around southern
weather revolve around a beautiful, southern spring after a cold winter where
the temperature dipped down below 30 for a few nights.
Yep, living in the South is just
about as good as it gets, and I not leaving anytime soon.
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